My annoying bike

 I was riding my bike, across the city, to deliver mail. But my bike needed a pit stop, except he already had two, so I  told him to keep going, then he threw me off him, and that got me TRIGGERED!! So I pulled out a zip tie from my pockets, and yellow spray paint, (his least favorite color) then I was zip tying him up to a post, and he screamed and flailed, but I managed to get the job done. Then, I spray painted him. He screamed like nobody can. I was so fed up with him, I just left him there and moved on.